Moving on...

So, it's been a week and change since we lost Boodah. It's still much harder than I ever would have imagined. But, alas, life goes on and with each day, there's more of that sad memory of great times than there is uncontrollable emptiness.

And just one more day now before I start the next phase of my professional life. Thursday is my first day as Associate Director for VPIRG. I've spent much of the past two and half weeks reading up on all the issues that VPIRG works on. I am by no means an expert, but I'm getting a good feel for things. I'm looking forward to starting so I can take on these new tasks and challenges and see what I have inside that PH wasn't able to tap.

There are many things I could babble on about ... planted the gardens yesterday and today. Here, that is. Now we have 2 times that space still to plant over at John and Wendy's! I have a sunburned back from bending over in this morning's early sun to plant. Feels good. Softball starts in a week. That's great. I gues we should get the mits out and practice a bit first. Nah, drinking a bit more is the only practice we need!

Enough babble. Time to finish this bottle of wine and walk the dogs.

I miss my baby

Goodbye, Boodah

I wanted to share with friends the sad news of the passing of one of our pack today, my baby, Boodah. Many of you knew him, and his story -- my first foster dog (yeah, only supposed to be mine for a month...), the many hardships and pain he indured in life, the two legged miracle dog with no knees who, in the end, was just a big black goobery ball of love, and three-time undisputed howling champion of the Stephen Huneck dog parties. He taught me so much in so many ways. He was my baby. He was the one of our pack that was truly both mine and Seth's. He was a friend, a brother, and a strong, wise soul. He finally got too tired to fight the body that didn't work for him, and just went to sleep quietly this morning at home. While the surprise of this has shocked us, at least we didn't have to make decisions for him. He went on his own terms. We pray, and know that he has finally found peace and freedom from a life too short, too painful and too filled with love to ever forget. We buried him here at home, Seth and I, Stoli and Lucy, john and Wendy there to say goodbye. For now he keeps company with my dad, Brin, Friend, Tele, Maizy, and other friends. We love you Boodah.


For those of you who wish to remember Boodah, please consider making a donation in memory of him to the place that helped bring him into our lives:

Central Vermont Humane Society
504 Mekkelson Rd.
Barre, VT 05641
http://www.cvhumane.com/donations/donations.html

Goodbye PH, Farewell

So today, after nearly a decade of work, I officially ended my tenure with Project Harmony. It's not without some sadness, and a lot of good memories and deep reflection that I close this chapter of my life -- a chapter that was not only professional, but very personally defining for me.

When I joined PH on September 9, 1996, I had just spend the past two months of my life sitting on the beach in New Jersey, recuperating from the 6 months in Rostov-on-Don, Russia that was one of the most challenging experiences one could expect for a first job out of graduate school. After the "Murphy's Law / Worst Case Scenario Experience" that was my time in Rostov, I had mentally and emotionally recovered (and gotten the best tan I had in years!) that summer. I came to PH not quite sure what to expect, still uncertain that I even wanted to remain involved in work dealing with Russia. But I thought, heck, I'll take a year, see what this is like, and get a lot of snowboarding in while doing it!

And that's just what I did. I was the Director of the Internet School Linkage Program, Project Harmony's first technology-related program. That year, I traveled over to Russia several times, confirmed for myself that I had too much invested in this whole Russian thing to give it up, and learned that life in Vermont was pretty good. Soon I fell in love with this place I now call home, and it made it so much easier to see a future for myself here in the Valley and with PH. Luckily, PH had the same kind of growth and development in mind for me. My writing background was quickly put to use on writing grants and, well, from there the rest is history. $45+ million in grants history...something I'm damn proud of.

Through all the ups and downs, hard times and successes, PH was and is a family. People matter at PH, and that's why so many people have called this organization home. Like any family, it's got its "issues". Did I want to leave? Probably not. But there comes a time in any relationship where you realize that for both parties, it's best to separate. For me, on a personal level, I needed professional and emotional space from PH in order to let all the lessons I've learned turn into wisdom to guide me forward. For PH, some fresh blood and new perspective is well-timed and needed. And so I think we part on good terms, wishing each other the best and not ruling out that our paths will cross again.

On a personal level, I am looking forward to letting go, no matter how hard that actually is. I have others parts of me I need to develop and new challenges I need to tackle. My dogs, my husband, my writing...all stand to get more of me now. Their generosity in past years has been so understanding and giving. It's time I gave more of myself to them now. In not doing grant writing for a while, perhaps my creative, non-fiction writing skills will actually come back! (Yes, a little know fact is that when you do grant writing for a living, the "grant-speak" is such a prolific part of your language that it's hard to let more creative language flow freely).

I have new horizons before me. And although I have some fears and hesitancy about the unknown, I am once again excited about the "what might be". That part of the story is yet to be written.

Save the Internet!

Do you buy books online, use Google, or download to an iPod? Everything we do online will be hurt if Congress passes a radical law next week that gives giant corporations more control over what we do and see on the Internet.

Internet providers like AT&T are lobbying Congress hard to gut Network Neutrality--the Internet's First Amendment and the key to Internet freedom. Net Neutrality prevents AT&T from choosing which websites open most easily for you based on which site pays AT&T more.

If Net Neutrality is gutted, many sites--including Google, eBay, and iTunes--must either pay protection money to companies like AT&T or risk having their websites process slowly. That why these high-tech pioneers, plus diverse groups ranging from MoveOn to Gun Owners of America, are opposing Congress' effort to gut Internet freedom.

You can do your part today--can you sign this petition telling your member of Congress to preserve Internet freedom? Click here:

http://www.civic.moveon.org/save_the_internet

I signed this petition, along with 250,000 others so far. This petiton will be delivered to Congress before the House of Representatives votes next week. When you sign, you'll be kept informed of the next steps we can take to keep the heat on Congress.

Snopes.com, which monitors various causes that circulate on the Internet, explained:

Simply put, network neutrality means that no web site's traffic has precedence over any other's...Whether a user searches for recipes using Google, reads an article on snopes.com, or looks at a friend's MySpace profile, all of that data is treated equally and delivered from the originating web site to the user's web browser with the same priority. In recent months, however, some of the telephone and cable companies that control the telecommunications networks over which Internet data flows have floated the idea of creating the electronic equivalent of a paid carpool lane.

If companies like AT&T have their way, Web sites ranging from Google to eBay to iTunes either pay protection money to get into the "fast lane" or risk opening slowly on your computer. We can't let the Internet--this incredible medium which has been such a revolutionary force for democratic participation, economic innovation, and free speech--become captive to large corporations.

Politicians don't think we are paying attention to this issue. Together, we do care about preserving the free and open Internet.

Please sign this petition letting your member of Congress know you support preserving Internet freedom.

A few good quotes for today

"We must learn to reawaken and keep ourselves awake, not by mechanical aids, but by an infinite expectation of the dawn, which does not forsake us in our soundest sleep. I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by conscious endeavor."
Henry David Thoreau, Walden

"Learning is finding out what you already know. Doing is demonstrating that you know it. Teaching is reminding others that they know just as well as you."
Richard Bach

"Argue for your limitations and sure enough they are yours."
Richard Bach

"Here's to the future! The only limits are the limits of our imagination. Dream up the kind of world you want to live in, dream out loud, at high volume."
Bono 1/1/90

A Rite of Spring

Well, on the last day of April, we put in our last few hours of skiing and riding this season. Although much of the season simply sucked, at least we went out on a good note! The skies were blue, the snow slushy, bodies tanning, the band played and we offered our last toast to the snow season. Seth and I had a blast. I have a good pink sun tan. It's all good. Now to put the gear away until the snow falls again.

My next career move

So, after a decade of working for Project Harmony, I will finish on May 12th. Beginning June 1st, I will start my new job as the Associate Director of the Vermont Public Interest Research Group in Montpelier, Vermont. It's been nearly a six month process leaving PH and I do so not without sadness, but now I have an exciting new future to look forward to that will get me back into activist mode working on local and state issues including environmental protection, energy policy, campaign finance reform, and health care reform. The best part about it -- no need to move and only an hour commuting time each day. More updates to come as the transition continues!

Big Powder @ Big Jay

So it's been a rough year...we all know that. We've had to work hard for the powder turns we've found. With the wind hold that has plagued Sugarbush, my best days have come when I've hiked for the stashes that the winds kept lifts from reaching. This week, Seth and I, together with a bunch of ski bums from Sugarloaf, made what I'm sure will be an annual pilgrimage at least -- to Jay Peak, for some tree skiing adventures. In the span of a few days, we explored, dropped in to the unknown, found which way the winds had been blowing, and hiked for the deep, untouched powder that makes the run out worth it all in the end.



It's always an adventure when we hook up with James and crew from the 'loaf. Last year we had a few days of fun up at Jay, but we had stayed on the mountain proper, simply sniffing out what lay in between trails and trees. This year, we were armed with GPS's, a few friends who had been out of bounds before, and a real driving sense of snow deprivation that made the search for freshies our soul motivation.




Day one was "The Dip" -- repeated runs off the back side, where we found fresh lines through trees and rock drops back down to where we had stashed the cars, right around back for more. I know that the first crew that loaded in the back of hte pickup is probably still sore from the whiplash that comes from being a passenger when I'm driving a stick shift in snowboard boots!



Day Two was the big adventure of our first time hiking Big Jay. I must thank the guys for convincing me to come along. I had thought of wussing out because I'm old and my legs were tired and since we hadn't done it yet, we weren't quite sure how a knuckle-dragger would fair. Well, it was well worth it and I'm glad I joined in the fun. What a typical scene -- Colleen and the guys...lone girl and lone snowboarder among a group of skier guys looking for a mountain challenge. After the ~ hour hike over, we dropped in to delightfully deep untracked lines that led over 3-6 foot rock drops, knee deep face shots and the quiet solitude of only having your friends hooting and hollering powdery bliss as the sonic backdrop.



Of course, there was the runout...on which I somehow found myself sucked onto the low road that led me into a half-exposed streambed drainage that I had to navigate through to find my way out. A little shwapple slalom, post-holing into a river and knee-buckling into rocks later and I made the exit, giving the guys enough time to down a beer in celebration of our newest back country victory.



So now we have a new semi-local back country stash we can seek refuge in when the need for steep-n-deep takes over. It wan't the trip out west into bottomless bowls that we may have dreamed of, but for this year, the Big Jay experience will do!

Remember the dumps

Can you remember? It wasn't that long ago... when we used to actually get SNOW?!?!

I remember days of having to literally tunnel out of my house, shoveling out from under 3-6 feet of snow. When I used to be concerned that the dogs might actually drown in powder.

No so this year...

Dreaming of Powder

It IS winter, right? This blog IS about dreaming out loud? Well, what I am dreaming about these days is powder. I miss those fluffy days of winter, where work isn't on my mind, where I take the morning off and disappear into the woods, just me and my board, to find the turns that await me.

This has been a rough winter for us powderhounds thus far, and this weekend seems to offer only more of the same -- a tease of snow, turning into rain and who knows what or how much of that questionable perecipitation.

Seth and I just wrapped up two demo days down at Stratton, testing out all of next year's ski and snowboard equipment. Fun as always. What got me though was that despite the fact that Stratton is two hours SOUTH of Sugarbush, they managed to have pretty decent snow coverage on almost all of their trails. It's amazing to see that snow making really does work when you turn on the guns with intent.

I just hope soon that mother nature starts making up for what she owes us...

Things you should not see in Vermont in the winter

This is WRONG. All of that green and yellow (rain) should be blue and white (snow). Why is Ullr somad at us? Why are you being so stingy and mean? We've had our January thaws before, but all this rain is REALLY driving some of us over the edge. I haven't been snowboarding in like two weeks now because there's no snow. The dogs have found all the frisbees and yard toys they lost in the end of November because all - yes ALL -- of the snow pack has melted. Hell, we're not even having an icing problem because NOTHING is frozen. Just rain. Wet, depressing, soggy freakin' rain.

A Leader and Inspiration for All

In his words:
"When we let freedom ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, "Free at last! free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!"

In the words of U2, from the song MLK"

Sleep, sleep tonight
And may your dreams be realised.
If the thunder cloud passes rain
So let it rain, rain down on he.
So let it be.
So let it be.

Sleep, sleep tonight
And may your dreams be realised.
If the thunder cloud passes rain
So let it rain, let it rain
Rain down on he.

Naughty or nice?

Well, if you ask my four-legged furry guys as of late, it would be naughty! They sure don't like it when the storm door closes them inside during the winter.

And for those last-minute shoppers, you can never go wrong with a nice Stephen Huneck print (artist's work above). Check out his site.

Media, politics and the search for truth

Taking an evening to do some reflecting on the world around me tonight. Seems as though when you work for a non-profit, it's hard to find time to step back and reflect on the world in which you are engaged on a daily basis. There is an emotional trade-off for having a job you feel good about at the end of the day -- you are totally emotionally and mentally drained. So the last thing you have the energy to do is to come home and write about how the world is going wrong.

I miss doing that. Seems as though when you are in high school and college (at least for me) you had hours each day to sit in your room, listen to rebel rock, and talk with friends about how the world would be better if they listened to what you had to say. I don't seem to have that time anymore. When I do squirrel away a few moments to reflect, though, my perspective is pretty harsh.


I have a few sources that I count on to help de-spin the news. It really does take a lot of effort to find REAL news anymore. What I find more interesting is the real news about how fake so much of our news really is. The PR machine and spin factories that create news products for us to consume...it's quite a business. A reliable source I'd recommend to keep you in check is the Center for Media and Democracy, who puts out PR watch and SourceWatch. You've got to respect a source that accepts NO GOVERNMENT or CORPORATE money. How rare is that?!?

Speaking of taking money from the government, this administration has pushed me to my limits. Having worked for a small international non-profit that has historically been 99% funded by the US Department of State, I have had to straddle the divide between what the government has wanted to fund and the real needs of communities where we work. That was my job -- spin the real need so it sounds like the public diplomacy work priorities. In many cases, we've had great partners in overseas embassies who were closer to the source who "got it" and gave us more room than DC would have to innovate and be responsive in our programming. But with this administration, there has been a marked change. Never have I felt the pressure to be the mouthpiece of the administration pushing policy, rather than a representative of the American people doing good and helping others. I didn't get into this field to spew rhetoric and coopt potential enemies. And for that matter, Congress is no better. They just want to know about the numbers -- make it quantitative and look good on paper so they can have something to show.

Somewhere between the Berlin wall coming down and 9/11, US public diplomacy lost its way. I need to get back into the non-government-funded realm of real assistance and real activism. More time doing what I do for Amnesty International and other groups whose moral compass hasn't gone totally askew.

Bono chosen as Time Magazine's Person of the Year

For being shrewd about doing good, for rewiring politics and re-engineering justice, for making mercy smarter and hope strategic and then daring the rest of us to follow, Bill and Melinda Gates and Bono are TIME's Persons of the Year.

Read the whole story.

Chargers put Peyton on his ass!!!

Ah, yes, the mighty have fallen! Long live my San Diego super-Chargers!!! After a season of almost wins and shouldn't have lost's, my Chargers managed to keep it together so well that they took down the pretty-boys of the NFL, the Indy Colts. How sweet is was to see Peyton under pressure...FINALLY. Brees was graceful under pressure and kept things going.

Yes, we may not make the playoffs for no good reason but our own last minute failings in too many games. But hey, if we're not going to make the playoffs, at least we knocked teh mighty kings off their thrones and prevented the perfect season! Not a bad consolation prize!. Way to go!

U2 - Ambassadors of Conscience

U2 have been awarded the ‘Ambassador of Conscience’ Award for 2005 by Amnesty International. Speaking of the award, Nobel Literature Laureate Seamus Heaney said that ‘U2 have sung themselves to where great singing comes from, that place where art and ardency meet in the light of conscience.’

The award was made to band members and manager Paul McGuinness. Irene Khan, Amnesty International Secretary General, praised U2 for doing arguably ‘more than any other band to highlight the cause of global human rights in general and Amnesty International's work in particular.’‘

Their leadership in linking music to the struggle for human rights and human dignity worldwide has been ground-breaking and unwavering. They have inspired and empowered millions with their music and by speaking out on behalf of the poor, the powerless and the oppressed.’

Previously won by Vaclav Havel and UN Commissioner for Human Rights Mary Robinson, the award ‘recognises exceptional individual leadership and witness in the fight to protect and promote human rights.’ It is made on a day when human rights are being celebrated around the world and Amnesty International launches a global music venture ‘Make Some Noise’.

The award cites U2’s work with Amnesty since the mid-1980’s, the Conspiracy of Hope Tour in 1986, Live Aid to Live 8 and the way the band have promoted the Universal Declaration of Human Rights on the Vertigo Tour.Bill Shipsey, founder of Art for Amnesty -- the global artist support network that organises the Award -- said that through songs like Pride (In The Name of Love), MLK, Miss Sarajevo, Mothers of the Disappeared, Walk On and One, U2 has helped spread the human rights message of Amnesty International to a global audience.

‘But U2 is, and always has been, about much more than just music. Band members have used their music and celebrity to champion countless human rights causes. Through their more recent involvement with DATA and The One Campaign they have brought the issues of debt, aid and trade -- particularly as they affect Africa -- to the world’s attention. They have shown that it is not enough to leave it to the politicians and ‘traditional’ world leaders to change the world. They have empowered and inspired millions of people with their music, their example and their action.’

Check out Amnesty’s Make Some Noise here http://www.amnesty.org/noise

Happy Festivus!

Thinking and living winter

So it's time to start thinking and living winter! No better way to get psyched up for it than to look back at the first run of the best day of our heliskiing adventure in Alaska last April. That's Seth there ripping the line.

So my body is really not ready for the mountain yet. After the first 3 day sor so snowboarding, I've had thigh burn like I've never had before. I guess pushing 34, maybe I'm getting old? Nah, I just work too much behind a desk when I really should be outside living life.

Even the dogs haven't been doing their job of nagging me to exercise with them. This morning when we let them out, they immediately wanted to come back inside and hop in bed. You can't blame them -- it was MINUS 9 DEGREES! You gotta love high pressure systems. At least we'll be able to see the stars well from the hot tub tonight. But if you ask me, I'd rather we get a dumping of snow. That's supposed to come Friday...just in time for John and I to be getting in a car and heading down to Jersey for our pre-Xmas visit. As Seth said, whenever I leave, it snows!

Actual Vermont snow pix soon to come.